


Kill It Before They See It

by Brain_Flower



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Tommy Ratliff (Musician)
Genre: Adommy, Letters, M/M, Roommates, Rules
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-24
Updated: 2012-05-24
Packaged: 2017-11-05 22:08:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/411516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brain_Flower/pseuds/Brain_Flower
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stay calm and I’ll meet you for Russian Roulette at any zombie events in California –Mike.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kill It Before They See It

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this before there was an Ashley as a bass player and Tommy as a guitar player, so I'm sorry about the old characters!

How big is your dick? Get better soon, I hope you don’t lose anything important…like your virginity…I don’t know anyone that survived a six day trip to a nudist beach and came back with their virginity or a genital piercing. Take some random girl out for pizza and in the morning you can eat the left over’s cold with orange juice and decaf coffee. The breakfast of champions! Oh, and remember your tips for day to day survival of any social event. 

-Have a plan  
-Get Naked  
-Enforce the plan  
-Eat Pizza  
-Grilled cheese with bacon  
-Sticky tape (double sided) for false teeth and duct tape for anything that moves and shouldn’t.   
Stay calm and I’ll meet you for Russian Roulette at any zombie events in California –Mike. 

Looking up at Adam, Tommy runs over the rules he laid down with Mike when they first moved in together. At first it had been a joke, the rules were, but then they actually lived by them, and on a poster board outside of their one person kitchen are their rules, written in different color sharpies. 

Mike actually sent Tommy that note when he was going through the hell that is college and it’s exactly what he needed to get him through. Now Tommy reads the letter whenever he needs a few positives in his life. Yeah…Tommy loves Mike. 

Right now though, Tommy’s kind of rethinking the whole, “Yeah girls are hot” idea and he’s feeling more like, “Yeah, girls are hot but my boss kissed me on stage in front of a lot of people…and that was really hot.” The only thing is Tommy’s boss is a guys and Tommy never honestly planned on changing his sexuality. 

Oops. 

Adam’s a big huge jackass for making Tommy feel this way, all confused and grumpy. Because now he spends most of his day wondering if he really does like Adam or if he likes the idea of submitting to a guy. He used to spend most of his days kicking people’s asses at guitar hero, but if anyone breaks his thinking about his problem, the claws come out and he’s got a good word or two to put in before he’s left alone. 

“Your cereal is getting soggy baby.” That’s Adam, and Tommy looks up from his bowl of frootloops and into Adam’s face. “You’ve been all tense lately, and irritable. I know it’s hard for you, being out all the time like this. Just tell me if you need to take a break, ok? Get caught up on your rest, I don’t want you getting sick.” 

See how much of an ass Adam is? Going around being all concerned and talking to Tommy in that soothing gentle voice. He’s an asshole all right, and Tommy would love to kick him right where it counts. 

Adam is such an asshole…yep a total jackass.

“M fine.” He mumbles, stirring the colorful cereal, “Just a lot on my mind I guess. I don’t mean to be a bitch.” Even though that’s a lie. “I’m sorry.” Yeah, he’s playing it up all innocent. 

“You’re fine sweetie.” Adam falls for it, “We’re off tomorrow, and we have a hotel room, you can catch up on your sleep. How does that sound?” Adam takes his cereal and dumps it and then refills his coffee cup, “Do you want new cereal?” 

“No.” Tommy mumbles, biting through the steam rising from the coffee and taking a big drink. It’s scalding and probably takes off a layer of skin from his throat on the way down, but it’s exactly what he needs. 

At the apartment him and Mike would have stupid boy contests, like who could drink the most hot coffee the fastest, who could drink the most sour milk, and his personal favorite…five o’clock body shots, in which Mike would get home at five and Tommy would stand naked at the door holding a shot of vodka, and then it was on. 

Tommy misses Mike…he needs to call that guys and talk to his butt…catch up and tell him what’s going on. If he had the patience to write a letter he would, but picking up a phone would be so much easier, not to mention faster. 

Adam doesn’t say anything else, but he moves to run his fingers through Tommy’s blonde hair and starts talking softly about upcoming events. It takes Tommy a minute to realize Adam isn’t talking to him, he’s talking to Monte who’s now in the tour bus kitchen

If Tommy’s not careful, he’ll fall asleep like this, so he takes his coffee cup and stands up, leaving to find Isaac or his phone. 

-_\/\/_-Siren Jax-_\/\/_-

“I think I’m gay.” Tommy tells Mike over the phone. He’s standing outside the bus, breathing in the fresh air, since fresh air on the bus consisted of farts and cheese and he couldn’t hold a conversation in that. 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Mike says slowly, and Tommy can see him holding up his hands, “Back up Jack, what the hell are you talking about?” There’s a pause, “Unless you’ve been lying about liking girls. Your sexuality shouldn’t change.” 

Mike has absolutely no problem with gays, but it’s a little weird, what Tommy’s telling him. “I don’t know Mike…I feel all weird, I think honestly I like Adam, maybe I’m bi but I never saw a guy I liked so I didn’t act on it. Now I think I like Adam and I’m not sure.” 

“Yeah, I gotcha, I totally understand.” Mike answers, “Look man, I got your back and your front no matter what. If you want to talk just call and we’ll gossip like old ladies in the beauty shop. You liking guys isn’t going to make us weird. But I have a few questions.” 

“Ok?” 

“When you’re near Adam does the wind whisper balls?” Mike asks, and Tommy laughs and is so glad he’s outside away from everyone else. 

“Yes, every time the wind blows I hear it say balls.” Tommy agrees, rolling his eyes, “The wind whispers balls.” 

“Alright…would you like…date his face or his personality? Or does he have a nice butt? Would you like…only date his butt? Because it might be weird if you only wanted to date his butt.” 

“His face.” Tommy answers, “I like that shit. No…actually I’d date all of him, not only his butt or his dick or anything.” 

“That’s good.” Mike says, like he’s thinking and Tommy can see him drum his fingers against his chin, “Well as long as we’ve got that all established…I guess all you have to do is talk to him, yeah?” 

“Guess so.” Tommy nods slowly, “Thanks Mike.” 

“No problem dick face…I’ll talk to you later, we’ll go through your progress so you better talk to Adam and get it all talked out because I’m going to kill you if you don’t.” 

Mike is for serious…

-_\/\/_-Siren Jax-_\/\/_-

Since Tommy never specifically said when he’d talk to Adam, he shoves the idea to the back of his mind with no more than a second thought. He’s going to get to it eventually. But currently Tommy’s thoughts are going a mile a minute…and that’s not cool, because they’re on stage performing and he’s distracted. Tonight’s special though, because it’s his twenty-ninth birthday and Adam’s gonna sing him a song. 

The singer already kissed Tommy dominantly and sexy during fever and now Tommy is so ready to hear Adam go full out Metallica and rock it. Tommy gets three kisses during the concert. One during Fever, one during his solo, and one during Enter Sandman. He wants nothing more than to hold on to Adam and kiss him and never let go, but he manages, he keeps cool. 

After the concert there’s cake and vodka in Adam’s suite, and Tommy tells the band and dancers about five o’clock body shots and then it’s on. They’re all getting into the quirky drinking game. 

Tommy’s smashed when he quits the game, finds himself a bottle of Jack Daniels and steals the rest of the cake, tray and all. Adam’s not involved in the game, isn’t even drunk, but he sits down beside Tommy and smiles, “You are going to have a wicked hangover tomorrow morning.” Adam murmurs, watching the blonde drink from the bottle. 

“Best birthday, fucking every.” Tommy slurs, not quite looking up from the cake. He gives Adam a screaming smile of blue stained teeth from the icing on the cake, and not swallowed Daniels. “You gave me cake, alcohol, and sang to me.” 

“Oh dear.” Adam smiles shaking his head and wiping blue spit from the corner of Tommy’s mouth, “You better be lucky you’re pretty. How about we brush your teeth and get ready for bed.” He says, glancing around the room. Most of the others have stumbled back to their rooms or passed out in the floor. 

“Nope.” Tommy smiles, popping the ‘P.’ “I wanna make out with you…I wanna get all dirty, it’s still my birthday.” 

“Honey, you’re already dirty.” Adam says taking the cake away and placing it on the bedside table, “You’re filthy. I’ve kissed you three times on stage, was that not enough?” He’s not taking advantage of his bass player, “Besides that you’re straight.” 

“Nope.” Tommy says again, “I’ve been rethinking that. I’m Adam-sexual.” He says and laughs, “When the wind blows it whispers balls and I’d totally date all of you, not just your butt or your face.” Ok…now Adam is totally lost. 

“Ok.” Adam says again quickly, “How about I don’t make you brush your teeth and you go to bed with funky blue teeth but we do get in bed and sleep, ok? Sound good? Let’s take some Tylenol too, baby.” Adam stands, taking his glass of wine with him and returns with two pills and a glass of water. 

Tommy’s not going a very good job of keeping the water in his mouth, so as soon as he gets the pills down Adam takes the glass and pulls back the blankets on the bed. “Come cuddle with me.” Tommy says and even though he’s totally drunk, Adam climbs in next to the blonde and holds him. 

-_\/\/_-Siren Jax-_\/\/_-

When Tommy finally wakes up at noon the next day, he’s got a killer headache and there’s bright light shining in his eyes. “Good morning sleeping beauty.” He hears Adam say and he doesn’t even bother looking up. Instead he rubs his eyes with his fists and tries to remember last night. 

Bad idea…Tommy’s stomach flips and now is not a good time for the blankets to want to hold him a little longer. He barely makes it to the bathroom in time to spew blue shit from his mouth into the toilet. And it doesn’t just let up, he’s in there for a hell of a long time, getting rid of all the cake and vodka. 

“Holy shit.” Tommy says once he has time to breathe. He runs the back of his hand over his mouth and reaches up to get rid of the blue contents in the toilet, before lying is cheek against the cool side of the bathtub. 

“Oh yuck honey.” Adam says walking in. He grabs a wash cloth, wets it, and sits down beside Tommy. “I told you last night you were going to have a wicked hangover.” Tommy’s skin is all hot and sweaty and uncomfortable, “You’re going to have to brush your teeth now, you have raccoon eyes, you look like Alice Cooper, baby. Do you want to stay in here until your stomach settles?” 

“No.” Tommy whines still confused, “I don’t want to stay here…I need to get up and find my other sock and my pants.” Because yes, Tommy is only wearing a shirt, boxers, and one black sock. 

“Hush, your pants are in my room and the bed must have snagged your other sock.” Adam murmurs, “If you’re sure you’re ok, come with me, yeah?” With Adam’s help, Tommy gets up and follows him to the kitchen, “No coffee today, drink this to settle your stomach.” Adam says giving him tea. 

It’s ok…sometimes Tommy drinks tea when he can’t sleep if his insomnia acts up. And it stays peacefully quiet, until Adam stops and says, “Baby, do you remember what you told me last night?” 

“I say a lot of things when I’m drunk.” Tommy answers, shrugging. 

“Well…last night you asked me to kiss you and claimed you were ‘Adam-sexual’.” The singer says and Tommy totally blushes bright red and does that nervous habit thing where he pulls on his hair. “Anything you need to tell me, besides the fact that you’re a very mouthy drunk?” 

“Umm…I don’t have a filter when I’m drunk, I say whatever I’m thinking. I’m sorry.” Maybe he should have talked to Adam weeks ago when he and Mike talked. He looks down at the tea and wonders why the floor hasn’t opened up and eaten him yet. It needs to happen. For a moment he’s sure he’s going to throw up, but he doesn’t. 

“Well yes…that much I found out. If you say everything that’s on your mind, am I on your mind often, being ‘Adam-sexual’, and wanting to kiss me. That’s why you’ve been so distant lately, honey?” Adam asks, and shit damn it, why did Tommy have to say it like that? “You’d date all of me, not just my butt and my face, and the wind whispers balls?”

“Holy Jesus.” Tommy moans, totally embarrassed. “I’m so sorry, I guess it’s been on my mind more than I’d like it to be. I called my roommate to talk the other day because I’m so fucking confused. I like you, I’d like to think that I like you more than a friend, but I’ve always told people I was straight. I don’t want to hurt you by using you as some…like test or something.” 

“Honey.” Adam murmurs, moving to sit down beside the tiny blonde. He wraps his arms around Tommy and kisses him gently. “It’s hard, I know…you’re new to fame and being more than a bar band and if you ever need a break don’t be afraid to say so. As for the other questionable subject…I don’t think you’re confused, I think you know exactly what you want, you just don’t know how to ask for it, yeah? So I’ll help you. What do you want more than anything in the world baby?” He swipes Tommy’s bangs behind his ears. 

“You.” Tommy whispers, eyes wide. 

Adam smiles, “That wasn’t so hard was it? I do love you Tommy Joe. I love little blonde boys that somehow lose their pants and socks while sleeping. And I love boys that party hard and drink too much and have huge innocent brown eyes. But more importantly, I love you Tommy.” 

“I love you too.” Tommy answers. 

They sit quietly for a while, until Adam moves to grab Tommy’s folded note from Mike. “I’ve heard about this from Monte and Isaac, your rules with Mike and day to day survival. Mind if I read it?” Tommy shakes his head and as Adam reads, he does. 

Tommy Joe (To whom I love so dearly…but not in a creepy way)

Here’s a reply to your question, “Do I have a doppelganger?” Yes! You do, everyone does…I think. I’m not really sure…Maybe if you laid down the horror movies for a while and got into those westerns again you’d realize everyone (I think) has a doppelganger. We’ll call your other side Tiger. So how is school?

How big is your dick? Get better soon, I hope you don’t lose anything important…like your virginity…I don’t know anyone that survived a six day trip to a nudist beach and came back with their virginity or a genital piercing. Take some random girl out for pizza and in the morning you can eat the left over’s cold with orange juice and decaf coffee. The breakfast of champions! Oh, and remember your tips for day to y survival of any social event. 

-Have a plan  
-Get Naked  
-Enforce the plan  
-Eat Pizza  
-Grilled cheese with bacon  
-Sticky tape (double sided) for false teeth and duct tape for anything that moves and shouldn’t.   
Stay calm and I’ll meet you for Russian Roulette at any zombie events in California –Mike. 

Adam laughs, “Sounds like rules of two very bored teenagers.” He says. 

“We lived by those rules! But yeah… they were pretty ridiculous.” Tommy smiles back. 

“Well I got a plan, get naked and let’s enforce it.” Adam says, and Tommy loses the shirt and then Adam’s kissing him. 

And so yeah, Adam Lambert, who was that stupid jackass a few weeks back, is now Tommy’s jackass and he wouldn’t as for it any other way.

**Author's Note:**

> Another request, you'll find a lot of mine are. -Siren jax


End file.
